Mo Chridhe

I decided to go down to Tulsa Saturday morning to see my cousins. The older ones (15 & 13) I lovelovelove, but the younger four drive me BANANAS. They’re cute, but damn is that good birth control.

Amy dragged me, her (boy)friend Lucas, Erin, and Erin’s friend Lana to this pool out in some place called Glenpool Saturday afternoon. Apparently, it’s the biggest public swimming pool around them, which is just plain sad because it was the size of most neighborhood pools around here. So we get there, to this place like 20-30 minutes outside of where my cousins live, AFTER we turn around to pick up Lucas off the side of the road ’cause his car broke down. Erin and Lana jump in, even though it was oh, I don’t know, seventy degrees out??? They had JUST gotten out when all the lifeguards yell at everyone to get out of the pool.

Some fucking kid threw up in the pool. THREW UP. IN THE POOL. WHO DOES THAT?!!??

The lifeguards made everyone leave for the day. Not even ten minutes after we got there. Clearly a wonderful experience in Glenpool fucking Oklahoma.

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Blahblahblah, Saturday night, the kids wanted to come to the Doubletree (my hotel down there) to swim. This is a ritual of ours, where Amy, Erin, Jason, Kelsi, and anyone’s friends spend a good two hours in the water. I was already exhausted from a four-hour drive, entertaining people, etc etc. Oh, did I mention I’m the one who gets to watch all the kids while our parents go drink up in the bar?

Jason and Kelsi ALWAYS fight. And it always results in Kelsi screaming her head off. ALWAYS. I ended up falling asleep on one of the chairs by the pool for I don’t even know how long, and I woke up annoyed and pissed off… so I left them all, bitched at our parents, and went up to my room.

So as I’m getting on the elevator, these two old guys (like 50-60 years old old, and possibly drunk) get in with me. We stay on the executive level, and you have to enter your card into the elevator slot to be able to get onto that level, so I did that. A wonderful conversation ensued.

Old Guy #1: “Ooohh, look, she’s on the special floor!”
Old Guy #2: “Yeah, oh what it’s like to be young and beautiful!”
Me: “…Hah.”
Old Guy #1, getting off on the 3rd level: “I’m on the floor right above the lobby… I’m just old and stupid.”
*Old Guy #1 leaves*
Old Guy #2, getting off on the 4th level: “Well, have a good rest of your night! Looks like it isn’t over yet!” (winky face)

Umm… yeah. I WISH I COULD MAKE THIS STUFF UP.